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Legal consultation
Barbarian Diordieva - the lawyer, an analyst.
If you had legal issues, the problems connected with realisation of your rights, and also the questions, concerning legislations, write.
Setting questions, specify region (Ukraine, Russia etc.).
Career and work
How to be more confident on work
On work as in a life, there are possibilities to defend the interests and to influence situations. Certainly, you do not change the world, or even the office, or the enterprise, but you can keep the advantage. You can prevent<маленькие убийства> what threaten your own advantage. You can stand for the interests and keep the work.
Certainly, there is a risk. We know young woman К who has lost the well paid work because tried to object the boss who has unfairly managed with it. And, though its objections have been stated in due form, it has been dismissed. К knew, that she risks, and has gone on this risk. Unfortunately, the boss has not accepted its self-confirming act.
On our supervision, it is a rare case. The majority of heads yours faithfully concern those employees who fairly express the consent or disagreement in ought - the confident form, not humiliating thus others and not restraining their interests.
Similarly, employees yours faithfully concern those heads who are deprived arrogance, do not resort to humiliating tactics, criticising subordinates, and concern the employees with due respect.
Very often we meet the heads who are fenced off by arrogance from the subordinates. Such people think, that tactics<верховного надзирателя> will force subordinates to work better. Alas, usually there is the return.
Let's analyse here some examples.
"Work after work"
You and your spouse were going to go tonight for a performance premiere, tickets on which have been bought preliminary, several days ago. Today you planned to leave work in time. However within day your chief has let to you know, that he would like, that you were late today on work and have worked over the special task overtime.
Alternative reactions:
You speak nothing concerning your plans and agree to remain.
If you react thus, at you a double problem. First, you will be afflicted, and secondly, your spouse will be afflicted. Your spouse will be afflicted not only that will not look a premiere of performance, but also your inability to protect the interests. Often we hear complaints like:<Ну, если я скажу что-нибудь, <поперек> to the boss, I know, it will dismiss me>. Or:<Мой босс не поймет или не захочет понять мою точку зрения>. Do not guess, try to stand for itself and to protect the interests.
Nervous, interrupting voice you speak to the chief: <Нет, я не останусь сегодня после работы!" - Потом Вы критикуете его за то, что он плохо планирует работу.
Badly! First, speaking to a nervous, interrupting voice. You force the interlocutor to prepare to<отпору>. Secondly, if you criticise the boss, condemning its method of work, can not doubt, that it even more<ощетинится>. It is better to adhere to the fact, that at you the important plans for this evening. And how it plans work, it is better to talk specially, another time.
Addressing to your chief in firm, but kind tone, you say to it about the plans for evening and that, unfortunately, you will not have today a possibility to work over the special task.
It is the correct self-confirming answer. Your firm and kind tone does not give an occasion to that the interlocutor has become angry and has answered you accordingly. You have clearly stated an essence of the matter, only do not spoil position, having told: <Вы думаете, я все равно должна остаться?>
"An error in work"
You have committed an error in any aspect of the work. Your head has found out it and lets to you know in, perhaps, sharp tone, that you should not be so are careless.
Alternative reactions:
You submissively apologise and say, that you regret, that it was silly of you and that it never will not repeat any more.
When you react thus, that is самоуничижительно, you as though authorise another to manage with you in the same way and in the future. If others do not know, that you feel, they do not have bases to change the relation to you.
You flash and say, that it has no right to criticise your work, - it does errors itself, - and you quite in a condition to cope with your work.
Reacting thus. You provoke it (it) to the further sharp attacks. Becoming aggressive (oh), you will not solve your problem. You only aggravate it. In spite of the fact that he (it) spoke () with you in sharp tone, it is better to it not to answer (it) with the same, and easier to notice, that it is not pleasant to you.
You recognise, that have made an error, say, that regret for it and next time will be more attentive. You add, that he (it) speaks in sharp enough tone, and that you do not see necessity for it.
Your boss has the right to criticise your work, but to talk to you should in polite tone. And still: anything bad is not present that you recognised the error. It does not do you by the weak person. More likely, on the contrary.
The late
One of your subordinates within last three-four days comes for work with delay.
Alternative reactions:
About yourselves or in conversation with others you complain about it, but speak nothing to the one who is the reason of your discontent, each time hoping, that it will not repeat any more.
The majority of us spends too much time, thinking about the problems which have arisen between us and other person, discussing these problems with others. We spend our time, grumbling, complaining and gossiping instead of undertaking positive steps to the decision of this problem.
You say to it, that it has no right to be late, that if it does not come for work in time, it will be dismissed.
Here we see a classical example of how the person complicates the life. As soon as you have felt, that you disturbs, that the worker is late, you should react immediately, differently you accumulate negative emotions and raise the index of aggression. It is shown in threats and intimidation.
You approach to it, and say, that last days it comes for work with delay, and would like to know the reason. If the good reason is not named, you say firmly, that it should try to come for work in time. If the reason appears valid, you say, that it should come to you and explain a situation.
Being interested in the reason of delay of your employee, you show care of it. Its answer in any case allows you to react to the created situation adequately.
Interview at receipt for work
You are present on such interview, and you understand, that interview is almost finished. You did not have a possibility to set any question of that you interest concerning this work. He (it) has just told (): "I think, we on it will finish. I will inform you on our decision concerning your nominee".
Alternative reactions:
You start something to speak quickly, you worry, are nervous, feel palpitation, and cannot formulate any question.
We do not want, that you showed excessive aggressiveness, but nobody can help you if you do not stand for yourselves.
You ask: "you have finished? I too wish to tell something". You say to it (it), that not only it (she) chooses you, you too should choose for yourselves this firm. After that you continue to speak to it (it) in obviously boastful manner, what you the fine worker.
If you are a son (daughter) of the owner of firm, it, maybe, and will descend to you from hands. That is we think, that to get this work you have not enough chances.
You speak: "Before to finish our conversation, whether I can set some the important questions for me concerning prospective work? I also would like in more details, than it is stated in the questionnaire, to tell to you about my previous operational experience." Continuing, you clearly state the questions and opinions. Before saying goodbye, you ask, as you can soon receive the answer.
That's good! Underlining the merits, you improve the possibilities to get desirable work. We mean only that it is not necessary to hide the achievements because of shyness. The head completing staff, usually appreciates people who are assured of itself and are able to stand for itself, not humiliating others.
Alberti R. E, Emmons M. L.
"Be able to stand for itself"